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Writer's pictureDebbie Knilans

Kindness ~~ You help people feel valued and seen

I had a wonderful discussion with my husband and father-in-law the other day. We were talking about the power and impact a few kind words. We agreed these words were not the empty “at-a-boy’s” absentmindedly handed out. But a true heartfelt and simple thank you or I appreciate you or I really like the thing you did.


My father-in-law shared how happy he felt to tell the chef at his assisted living apartment that he liked the meal the other day. It was simple words of appreciation but had a big impact on the chef.


I shared a story about my dear friend who had been struggling in a new job. After several months, she was thinking she sucked at everything. The only feedback she was getting was to how to do things. While helpful, it reinforced the story she was telling herself about sucking at everything.


She shared her struggles with her boss, who immediately told her, oh no, you are doing a wonderful job. Her boss shared the success they were seeing in the work she was doing. Unfortunately, her boss was focused on getting work done and the outcome and failed to see the impact on my friend.


These kind words were not simply “at-a-girl” and “you are doing swell”. These words reinforced that my friend was making a positive impact on the work and contributing to the success of the business. These kind words made her feel valued and seen.


Side note – My friend was incredibly brave to share her thoughts with her boss! Great example of self-awareness and self-assurance! That message is worthy of a future blog post!


Your words of kindness have an impact. Your words

~~ Help people feel seen and provide a sense of value.

~~ Show you recognize the person.

~~ Create a true connection with them.

~~ Demonstrate you truly appreciate what they are doing.


Here are a few simple options to share kindness as you move about your day.

  • Say thank you to the person who holds a door for you, cooks your meal, drives your bus, makes your coffee, etc.

  • Acknowledge someone you don’t generally acknowledge, such as the person you pass walking to work every day, the individual in line at the coffee shop, the neighbor walking their dog, etc.

  • Be present and really listen to the people you encounter today or at the office, without focusing on what your response will be. I promise you will get more out of the conversation and feel more connected.

  • Smile at someone. Period. It’s that simple.

Try these simple acts of kindness today. And like my father-in-law, feel how rewarding it is to be appreciative of the people you encounter in your daily life.


If this topic intrigues you and you want to explore with me, schedule a free 30-minute consultation. You can also join my mailing list below to keep in touch.




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